Spiritual Revolution

PARAMAHAMSA SRI NITHYANANDA on Fulfilment in relationships WE CANNOT differentiate between love and lust today. Our lives are completely taken over by the fantasy and mental picture that lust creates in us. Our love, or the emotion that we call love, is tainted by greed and fear. All our love is conditional. We can only love someone as long as that person does what we say and obeys us. Control is a precondition to love. In ancient days, people had the capacity to enjoy their marital pleasures completely without fantasies. They lived out their desires and were ready to give up the life of householders by the age of 40. Vedic scriptures prescribe four stages of life to attain the ultimate spiritual goal of enlightenment. These four stages of life are appropriate for each phase of one’s life. The four stages in life are: Brahmacharya, a student; Grihastha, a householder; Vanaprastha, a householder spending his time in reflection, after having fulfilled his duties as a husband and father; and finally Sanyasi, the ascetic, when the householder retires to be alone, in search of enlightenment. Man and wife lived their lives fully till they were about forty. They then disengaged from physical relationship and focused on their spiritual development. In this stage, called Vanaprastha, they moved away from day-to-day life. They could either continue as such the rest of their lives or they could move to the next and final stage of renouncing all worldly possessions as sanyasi, ascetics. Each stage of life was taken seriously and fulfilled. These days everything is half-hearted. Very few couples today understand the sacred verses chanted during their marriage rites. Only the purohits, the officiating priests, get married these days! The couples are disengaged from the beauty of the entire process of the ritual that leads to a meaningful relationship. The beautiful rite performed in front of the fire in traditional Hindu weddings is called saptapati, the seven steps. There is deep significance when a married couple take the steps together. The couple vows to each other seven times, with fire as their witness, that they will be intimate and develop a deep love for each other. The Vedic culture did not have the concept of divorce. In Sanskrit no words exist to describe marital separation. Marriage was a wonderful relationship that couples shared without fear and greed, with unconditional acceptance of one another. This relationship extended to all other aspects of their lives.

PARAMAHAMSA SRI NITHYANANDA - Stop chasing your Thoughts!! SOCIETY, in the form of political or religious institutions, controls you through fear and greed. These institutions believe that unless you are prodded by fear and greed, you cannot be effective, productive and valuable. But productive effective and valuable to whom? It is certainly not for any advantage to your own Self, but perhaps to the benefit of these institutions. Fear and greed make you seek the external world for fulfilment. You seek to act on your thoughts and words. These as you would have experienced throughout your life can never be fulfilled. The same fear, the same greed reappears, however many times you may have experienced them before. You are in rajas, the mode of aggression when you act on your thoughts. People question, how can I live without acting on my thoughts, who will pay my bills? Please understand. If nature provided within you a system that converts bread into blood, can it not take care of providing you with bread as well? Nature does not trust you with anything that is critical to your living. That is why all your essential activities such as breathing, growing, digesting, etc, happen without your involvement. I say to you, stop acting on your thoughts. Stop looking for their meaning. Instead seek the source of thoughts. For instance, if you feel hungry, ignore that thought. When your body feels that desperate hunger, it will by itself seek and procure the food to fulfil its needs. When you do this, when you stop acting on the meaning of words, you will fall into tamas, into inaction. That is what you are afraid of. There is nothing to fear. You will stay in that inaction till all your hatred against your restlessness and greed get worked out. Once that happens, you will come out of that inaction, that tamasic state, purified. Please understand that you do not move from tamas into rajas and then into satva as you may think. You do not, as you think, move in sequence from inaction to aggression and then to peace. You start with rajas, which is the state of your day-to-day activity, when you are in the mode of doership, seeking to fulfil the meaning of your thoughts and words. When you stop seeking meaning you will fall into inaction, tamas, for a brief period, till you start seeking the source of your thoughts and move into satva. You will feel the effect of inner healing, and you will understand that the universe does take care of you.

Here is an easy way to catch the ego; to know when the ego is coming up.

Whatever makes you uncomfortable is ego!

Look at your own life.

Whenever you experience pain, anger, jealousy, it is always the result of feeling separate from someone else, of feeling alone, of feeling cheated. In times of misery, you always experience yourself as being all alone. This is the ego at work.

In times of joy, you feel naturally connected with everyone and everything around you. When you are joyful, happy, laughing – these are the times when your ego is at its weakest.

In your present life, you may experience these moments temporarily. But meditation is going to take you to a permanent state of bliss. Meditation is the process of falling in tune with the whole of Existence. In meditation, there is simply no place for separateness, no place for the ego. Once you sense the lasting harmony of everything, once you sense the deep interconnectedness of all of Existence, what will be the need for maintaining the ego? The ego is your armor against the world. The ego is your shield in times of war. If everything is peaceful, if everything is harmonious – then where is the need for armor, a shield? You can just relax, that’s all.

But you are used to struggling for everything!

We have to create a big problem and then fight with it. This is what your ego wants. That’s why you find it so difficult to meditate – because meditation is such a simple thing! It is too simple, actually. All you have to do is sit silently and unclutch from your thoughts as they come up.

Is that so difficult?

Actually there is no need to teach or learn meditation!  Meditation should simply happen.  Just sit still for a few minutes and watch your mind, it is enough to get a glimpse of reality.

Just for a few seconds, if you can sit silently, watch your racing thoughts, just be – that will be enough to convince you of the truth. And once the truth is known, where is the place for your ego?  The ego will have to be dropped. You will drop it naturally.  That’s why the ego fights meditation so hard.Meditation is the death of ego!

So the only problem you will face is the strong resistance from your ego.  When you are meditating, the ego will raise a thousand questions. Doubt is the most deadly weapon that the ego has! The ego will continuously create doubts and questions in your mind.

In the beginning it will make you worry, Can I really meditate?  Can I sit for so many hours with my bad back?  Is this path really for me?

What if I get drawn too deeply in?  What will happen to my family?  Will my friends call me crazy?  Am I really crazy?  

If you are working with a master, it will raise doubts against the master!  Is the master really authentic? Does he know which technique is right for me? What is his purpose in teaching me meditation? Is this some kind of hypnosis?  So if you find these kinds of questions arising, don’t bother. Simply drop the questions and continue with the meditation. Don’t feel guilty about having these questions!

These questions arise naturally in everyone’s mind. And don’t try to struggle with these questions.  Don’t make the mistake of struggling with the ego!

Ego is just something imaginary; it is nothing but the lack of awareness; it has no positive existence.  Just like darkness is a state of no-light, ego is a state of no-awareness. If you are in a dark room, can you fight the darkness and push it out to make the room bright? Does it make sense to struggle against the darkness?

In fact, your solution has nothing to do with the darkness. You have to simply bring in a lamp and the darkness will disappear on its own! In the same way, don’t waste your energy fighting with the ego. Focus on bringing awareness into your meditation. By and by, the questions will drop naturally.

PARAMAHAMSA SRI NITHYANANDA on Don’t Worry, Be Blissful! A small Story: THERE was a wise and compassionate king. All his subjects came to him for advice. Once a woman came and complained to him that her husband was ill-treating her because she could not bear a child. Another man came to him and grumbled that his children were greedy. They were after his wealth and ill treating him. A poor man petitioned him for money and lamented saying how wretched he was to be poor. A rich man came to the king and complained that he had no real friends. Every one he knew was nice to him only because of his wealth. The king, after talking to many people, found that the same things — children, money, and health — repeatedly induced people to worry and be sad. Money was needed by one, but was causing sorrow to another. The king hit upon a novel idea, he called his ministers and said: what if we open a Worry Exchange (WE), can’t people come and exchange their worries? A person who was unhappy without children could exchange his or her worry with another who was unhappy because he or she had children? A rich man who was unhappy could trade his worry with a poor man who needs money. His ministers thought it was a brilliant idea. So the WE was inaugurated. On the appointed day all the king’s subjects arrived at the WE, long before it was to open. They stood around and talked, talked and talked. WE stayed open until dusk. Not a single trade materialized. Not one person came forward to barter or swap his own worry with another worry. The king was disappointed. However, instead of being angry, he enquired from his subjects why no one came forward to trade worries, though they had all said the WE was a brilliant idea. The subjects replied in one voice: we prefer to live with the worries we know, rather than exchange them for something that we do not know! Worries become, over time, our crutches, our companions. We feel lost without them. We need them to justify our behaviour and depend on them to lead our daily life. Our worries have no meaning or purpose. I tell people to write down their worries in our Life Bliss Courses. I tell them to look at this list after three or six months. They then tell me that 90% of the worries never materialized. The 10% that did were good for them! If we allow ourselves to release our grip from worries and relax in the present, then we can begin an intimate, spiritual journey. The purpose of our life is to journey inwards and experience bliss, not to indulge in wasteful worries.

PARAMAHAMSA SRI NITHYANANDA on Why we cannot tolerate criticism A lady came to me complaining that she is hurt by even small criticisms coming from others. She said she was very sensitive. I asked her to stop using that word. I said, ‘You are not sensitive. A really sensitive person will be porous; she will allow the words to pass through her. Only arrogant people get hurt. If you are hurt, please understand that you are arrogant. You are strong like a stone, which is why words come and hit you.’ A sensitive person would have allowed the words pass through her; she will never suffer. Even if someone is deliberately rude, a sensitive person understands where such a person is coming from and is not defensive. Suffering is always from arrogance, never from sensitivity. A person who is sensitive will never suffer. A sensitive person will suffer on account of another person in distress, not for oneself. You suffer from words when you stop them, when you resist them, when you create your own meaning out of them. When we do not create our own meanings out of words, we do not suffer. We play with words. We always choose nice words to support our ego. We do not say, ‘I am hurt because I am arrogant.’ We always use polished words such as, ‘I am hurt because I am sensitive.’ Please don’t cheat yourself with words. Let your words be unfiltered by your ego. Let me tell you a small story: Once, a contractor wanted to donate a sports car to an official. The official refused, saying, “I am an honest person and I cannot think of accepting this gift.” The contractor asked him, “In that case how would it be if I sell you this car for Rs 10?’ The official replied immediately, ‘In that case, I will have two cars!’ When an untruth is wrapped in gift packing, you forget you have a problem. You accept it without a murmur. However, when truth is presented bare, you do protest. Presented bare, truth hurts; ego cannot tolerate truth easily. We are so concerned about politically and socially correct statements, it seems no longer acceptable for anyone to speak the truth. But it seems to be perfectly acceptable to lie in a politically correct manner. Ramakrishna says beautifully, ‘Let your words and mind be straightened.’ Whatever is, let it be offered straight without filtering. Learn to accept truth bare. At least you will know you have a problem that you can solve.

Whether you believe it or not, your life and all its happy and painful circumstances have been consciously chosen by you at the time of your previous death! Only if you can align yourself with the idea of reincarnation will you be able to grasp this truth. At the time of your death, based on all the intelligence that you have when you leave the body, you decide what type of a body you want to take next. This decision is based upon the lifetime you just completed. With the ‘file’ created by the experiences and impressions of the past life, you review the entire file. You ask yourself, ‘What is the best experience that I wanted to have in my life but never had – or which I already experienced, but want to relive once more?’ Then you refer to the past life to see all the experiences you had in your life. Whatever you think was the best, even if it was just a glimpse, you choose that. In order to repeat the same peak experience, you decide on the sort of place that would be good to be born in. Then you decide what type of father and mother are needed. You choose the kind of physical body and circumstances which will help you fulfil that desire. Even suffering, pain, diseases and poverty are all conscious choices! At the time of death, you no longer divide life into ‘good’ and ‘bad ‘ experiences – only experiences. So you may choose any kind of experience to repeat. Sometimes, like in the case of poverty, you make a decision because you don’t want to take the responsibility. It is very difficult to understand this, but it is the truth. When you don’t want to take responsibility of having and guarding money, you choose to be in poverty. Having money means a lot of responsibility. You are always in danger; anytime you can be harassed. You can be kidnapped and your money can be taken away from you. These are all the risks money will bring in life. Therefore, you may choose to be born in poverty! That is why we say even poverty is a conscious choice. The time and other circumstances of birth are also significant in deciding what kind of a life you will have. The moment of your birth is like a snapshot in Consciousness. When you took birth, for one moment the camera shutter opened, and life entered your body. So whatever was there in the scene got recorded. It means that whatever planetary positions existed at that moment got recorded. That is why the time of birth is very important. It is only based on that information that your consciousness functions always. But the snapshot can be altered! Throughout your life, you get many chances to alter the blueprint you came with. Meditation is one way of doing this. Meditation is like exposing your film directly to the sun. Even if the camera’s shutter opens for just one moment, whatever is in front of the camera will be recorded in the film. If the shutter is left completely open, what will happen? If the sun’s rays directly fall on the film, what will happen? Whatever is recorded will be erased. An enlightened being has direct access to your ‘camera’. He can consciously keep the shutter open for longer time. So naturally, whatever is recorded will be erased – meaning, all your past karma will be erased. When you take birth it is like opening the camera shutter for one moment. When you are initiated, the shutter is completely opened. Naturally, the sun’s rays enter and all your karmas are wiped out. That is why, when you are initiated, you are called dvija – twice born. You take a second life, a new life. And the one who operates your camera to hold the shutter open for that extra time is called the Guru – dispeller of darkness.

PARAMAHAMSA SRI NITHYANANDA on Everything is Auspicious THE whole of Existence is an auspicious happening. We are part of Existence, so everything happening around us is also auspicious! This is the truth of Existence. Nothing that happens in Existence is inauspicious. Everything is only a blessing. If we understood this clearly, we can see everything as extraordinary. Everything will appear as a miracle. One day a duck hunter went to the market to buy a bird retriever dog. To his amazement he found a dog that could walk on water! He immediately took it home. He invited one of his friends to hunt the next day and took the dog with them. When a flock of ducks came near, he took aim, fired and silently watched. The dog walked on the water and retrieved the bird. He looked at his friend for a reaction but the friend remained silent. He asked him, ‘Do you see anything unusual about my dog?’ The friend replied, ‘Yes, your dog is unable to swim.’ Miracles are continuously happening in front of our eyes, but we continuously miss them! Only because we miss them, life itself appears to be dull. When we start perceiving them, our entire life becomes a miracle. In the whole world there are only two kinds of people. The first kind will try to judge, criticize and develop the things happening in the world according to their ideas. There is the other group which feels that whatever is happening is auspicious. Whoever feels that whatever happens is auspicious, lives in eternal bliss, in celebration. The other group continuously suffers because it tries to change things all the time. Just accept and celebrate Existence with all its different dimensions and paradoxes. Everything has a message for us including death and disease. Ramakrishna Paramahamsa, the enlightened master, says this beautiful story: Two men entered a mango grove. One of them sat and counted the number of trees. He studied the variations in their size, the number of branches, density of leaves and number of mangoes across the trees. He thought about where they would sell, what would be the cost, etc. The other man simply ate a few mangoes, enjoyed himself and left! If we continuously use our logic to analyze and judge and try to bring things under our control, we will miss the whole beauty of the existential miracles. So don’t judge anything. Everything has something to teach us. Accept and celebrate the very existence of the world with the innocence of a child! Nithyanandam.